I guess I've had a case of writer's block here lately! My goal was to start doing at least two entries a month, and I failed. I didn't even manage ONE in November! Boo! I'll seriously try to do better!
I love fall. It's my favorite season! Of course, now it's more like winter, but that's okay! We have had a beautiful fall here! The leaves on the trees really do change color, and they are so pretty. The wind blows pretty hard here, and when it really gets going, it looks like it's raining leaves! I love it! I just think that fall never lasts long enough! I just really start enjoying it, when all of a sudden, it's full blown winter! It's not just how beautiful things are outside during fall, it's the way I get to decorate inside, too! I love my dining room that time of year! I'm having a hard time forcing myself to switch out table cloths and place mats. However, I did get my Christmas centerpiece put together, so I'm on my way!
Jeremy and I had such a wonderful Thanksgiving this year! I'm so glad that it turned out well. "Firsts" are so important to me! This was our first Thanksgiving together, and it was also my first time cooking it on my own. Jeremy was a really big help! I couldn't have stayed sane without him! He also cooked his green bean casserole, and it was as yummy as always! I know that cooking a meal that size can be really stressful, and I wanted to enjoy the day like everyone else, so I started cooking on Tuesday! It worked out perfectly, though. I baked on Tuesday, made the sides on Wednesday, and, on the big day, all I had to worry about was the turkey and ham (and warming everything up, of course). We were so relaxed, and just really enjoyed ourselves and our company. The only thing that would have made it better is if the turkey would have turned out better. Live and learn, though! It was my first turkey, so I'm allowed a little room for error. I found a marinade, and injected the turkey the day before, and that is where I failed. I should have made my own, because this one was just too strong! My uncle thoughtfully gave me a recipe, so I'm going to try that next year, and hopefully that turkey will turn out to be just as good as the rest of our meal was this year! It was my intention to invite the single soldiers from Jeremy's office, and a couple others from his unit, so that they would have a good Thanksgiving while being away from their own families. I didn't have the turn-out that I had planned, for reasons I'm still not entirely sure of myself, but one of my most favorite people here was able to come, and for that I am very thankful! We had good food accompanied by good conversation, and you really can't ask for better than that!
Now, Jeremy and I aren't far from our very first Christmas as a married couple (and our first while together in the same time zone). I love Christmas! It really brings out the best in people! I love the search for that perfect gift. I love the look on the face of the recipient when they open it. I love taking the time to hang every ornament in exactly the right spot. I love hanging stockings, and then filling them with little happy's just right for that person (or cat). More than I love opening my own presents, I love watching people open gifts that I have put real thought into. I love children at Christmas! I wish that we could see our nephew and niece open their presents, but I'll settle for the pictures. I'm going to miss being at my grandma's house on Christmas Eve, but I'll be with my husband, and there is nowhere I'd rather be than in his arms.
Our plan is to be at Disneyland Tokyo for Christmas. I waited too long to make the reservations, though, so we won't be staying on property, but we are okay with that! I found a nice hotel near Disneyland, and, just being in the park for Christmas will be magical! We haven't gotten to take a honeymoon, so we're really looking forward to this. We had hoped to go to Bali in January, but Jeremy will not be here, so I'm really looking forward to Disney! I need this Christmas to be perfect, because it's not only our first, and our honeymoon, but I won't be spending next Christmas with my husband, so this one just has to be perfect! Honestly, though, as long as we are together, I'll have exactly what I want for Christmas!
I love the holidays! Yes, the holidays...it is okay to call them that. I'm referring to more than just Christmas. The holidays start with Thanksgiving, and they go all the way through the New Year. I love the food and being with family. Okay, I'll stop going on and on! I'm turning into a sap in my old age!
I really like being here in Japan. I finally forced myself to get started learning some of the language today. There are some sounds that I have a hard time making, but I am not going to give up! Jeremy had bought "Instant Immersion" Japanese while he was still in Germany, and, today, I finally got tired of staring at the box, and put in disk one. Now, I'm just going to have to make myself stick with it!
In addition to taking the first step in learning the language, I have gotten into a little volunteering to occupy my time. I volunteered to be the secretary for our FRG. We had our battalion Christmas party this past Saturday, and we invited the kids from the Bott Memorial. That is an orphanage here, and every year, we do an angel tree for those kids. Jeremy and I adopted two angels. On Saturday, all the kids got their gifts right from Santa Claus. The looks on their sweet little faces were priceless! Jeremy and I helped to set up, and we, as a battalion, put on a pot luck dinner for those kids as well as all the battalion families. I made my grandma's squash dressing, her corn casserole, two pumpkin pies, and Jeremy made his green bean casserole. A bunch of other people made all kinds of food, too, and it turned out to be a lovely lunch! Everyone had such a great time! All the kids got to play and have their pictures taken with Santa. It was just an awesome day! I'm hoping to find more things like this to get involved with, not just at Christmas, but year round!
If I don't get around to making another post before Christmas, I want to wish everyone a very Merry Christmas! I hope that you are all enjoying this time of year as much as I am!
I just thought that I'd throw in a few photos: That is our adorable little car. I told Jeremy that I wanted something small. He found this, and it's perfect! It's a Nissan March, and thanks to its size, it is the perfect car for these tiny Japanese roads! Jeremy did awesome in finding it! That's a good hubby! These other photos are of our living room. I love this room. It's so homey. We spend so much of our time here. We got lucky, it's a really nice sized room! The half moon table was Jeremy's idea. It's really pretty, and it sits right next to our door. I'm finally adding these photos as promised, although I hadn't intended it to take this long! Once again, Merry Christmas!
Wow! So much has been going on that it's hard to know where to start! I guess my biggest news is that we finally made it into our house, and all of our things are here as well! Yay! In the interest of being fully honest, I must admit that not ALL of our things made it here, but MOST certainly did!
Our home is like a townhouse. It's much bigger than the one Cara and I shared in Hattiesburg, though. Thank God! I'm surprised our friendship survived that! Jeremy and I decided that it is important for us to be comfortable in our home. It is the place that we will spend most of our time while we are here, and to that end, we bought some furniture, instead of using all army supplied furniture. I think that it's awesome that the army has furniture that we can use, and we are using some of it, (like our whole dining room) but, like I said, we wanted to be comfortable. And, comfort comes from owning your own things...your own comfortable things! If army beds are any indication, then I'm sure army couches aren't very comfortable! We bought a new living room suite and a new bedroom suite, and we love them both! Falling asleep on the couch is just as easy as falling asleep in bed! Truth be told, I had picked out a different living room suite, (one that didn't show Scrappy's fur quite so easily) but once Jeremy sat on this couch, he was done. There wasn't any valid reason to not go with this furniture as opposed to that I had chosen, so I let him win this battle! Honestly, I love it, too. I have no complaints! As for the bedroom, we both saw this set and loved it! We got lucky there!
We also got a CAR!!! I love my little bitty car! I told Jeremy that, given how small the road are here, I wanted a little car. We found the perfect little car, and we both wish that we could bring it home when it's time to go, but we know that isn't going to happen. It's just too expensive. The car is a silver Nisaan March. They don't make them in the states, but they should! I do have my driver's license here, and I am slowly, but surely, getting used to the tiny roads. Driving on the left hand side of the road doesn't really phase me, it's the narrow roads that are killer! Roads that, back home, would be considered one-way, are two-way traffic here. No joke!
We have gotten out some more, as well. We went to the Tokyo Game Show. It was an adventure! I'm not a gamer myself, but Jeremy most definitely is! I didn't think I'd like it, and told Jeremy he could go without me, but I'm glad I went. His friend, Nick, went with us, and he and I got lots of cool pictures of people (mostly girls) dressed in costume. It was seriously neat, and every guy's dream of seeing hot Asian women in costume! Don't worry, ladies, there were some guys dressed up, too (although not nearly as many lol)! They gave out all kinds of free stuff and let people play the newest games. It was a really good time!
I hosted my first soiree (haha) as a married lady, and although, I had hoped more people would show, it was a fun night! Saturday afternoon I started getting stressed about being behind with the food and thinking I wouldn't be dressed on time, but everything came together at the last minute! I had done so much on Friday that I was just kind of taking my time on Saturday, and it caught up with me. I was a little late coming downstairs, but still managed to make it down before most of our guests arrived. It was a housewarming party, and Jeremy invited the people that he works with, and their families. I invited my friend Brenda, and her two kids. Brenda and the kids came on Friday and left on Sunday, and I loved having them here! It's so nice having someone from home within driving distance! We made it a late night girls night, with Brenda, three other army wives, (one of those wives is also a soldier) and myself heading out to the bar on post. It was such a good time! These ladies really make me feel like I'm at home here! They're a lot like my girls back home (no one get jealous, haha)! Given how nervous I was to come here and make new friends, I think it's amazing I found them so quickly, and am undeniably thankful for them.
Oh! The day after the housewarming, Jeremy and I went to Machida to meet and have lunch with two of his WoW friends. I was a little nervous about it, but they were completely normal, nice people. They're a married couple, and both are in the air force. He's stationed in Japan, and she also will be sometime soon. It was a nice lunch, there weren't any of those awkward lapses in conversation that sometimes happens when people first meet. They were having some kind of festival going on that day in Machida. We could see part of it from the window by which we were sitting. The people were in full traditional dress, dancing, playing drums...there was even a monkey! After lunch, Jeremy and I stopped and watch them dance for a while. It was really something to see!
I have been having such a great time here with my husband! For some reason, though, I haven't been sleeping very well. For at least a month, I've had insomnia really bad. It usually takes me forever to fall asleep, and once I do, I sleep for no more than an hour and a half before I wake up. I don't mean wake up, look at the clock, and fall back asleep. No, I wake up, eyes wide open, and can't get back to sleep. Some nights I just toss and turn. I long for those nights! They are few and far between! At least with the tossing and turning, I'm asleep for the most part. When I wake up, though, I'm awake. I do eventually fall back asleep, but usually it takes me an hour or more to fall asleep, and then I wake back up in about another hour. It's starting to affect my personality and my ability to get things done during the day. I'm going to the doctor on Monday, though, so y'all say a prayer!
I miss all my friends and my family back home, but don't y'all worry about me, because I'm well taken care of here! Jeremy is a wonderful husband, and I am making some really good friends!
One more thing! I know I didn't include any pictures of our house and our car, but, I will very soon! I am going to start blogging more often, it's just that so much has happened recently that I haven't had the time. No worries, though! I'm on top of it! Filling y'all in on our life is very theraputic for me!
I am finally exactly where I want to be! I haven't been here for very long yet, so I'm not ready to say whether or not I love it here, but I will say that I love being with my husband! It was a long six months without him, and I'm loving every minute I have with him!
I haven't been here long enough to accumulate a bunch of stories, but I will fill you in on what's been happening so far! My flights were (thankfully) rather uneventful. I can say that the Atlanta airport is massive! Luckily, it's not that confusing, just really big. The flight from Atlanta to Narita was pretty long. I managed to read 3/4's of a good-sized book, watch two full length movies, and take a short nap. Also, they fed us three different times. Surprisingly, the food wasn't that bad! Actually, the food on the plane was better than the over-priced food in the airport! Unfortunately, it was loaded with salt!
Jeremy and I have gotten out some...I'm constantly wanting to go, go, go, and he'd rather stay in and read, but we're trying to find a happy medium. We went to Machida my first weekend here. Machida is a part of Tokyo the way Metairie is a part of New Orleans, only with bigger buildings and a much larger population. We had a great time walking around and going into shops. We ate at a TGI Friday's, ha ha! It was a lot to take in, though. There are so many people everywhere here! We got to Machida by train, which is, in itself, an adventure! I'm not exactly certain how the train system works here, yet. I will figure it out!
Machida Train Station
We went into Tokyo again this past weekend, and not just the outskirts! We went to Tokyo Dome City. This place is massive! They've got restaurants, entertainment, rides, you get the picture! I loved it! It was so much fun! We rode something called The Dive. You stand in these capsule like things and shoot at these little targets with a laser gun. That may not sound like fun, but you're moving forward and spinning while you're doing it, and the ride keeps score, so you can see how you stack up against your friends. It's pretty awesome!
We also rode a water ride, where, of course, we all got soaked, but considering how hot it is here, we didn't mind one bit! Japan is hotter and more humid than Mississippi, by the way. Jeremy says he warned me about that, but I don't remember it, and I wouldn't have believed it anyway! Okay, back to Dome City! We were looking forward to riding that awesome looking roller coaster from the top picture, but it's closed down. That was a huge disappointment! That ferris wheel looks cool in pictures, but it moves really slow, so we didn't get on that, either. I might try it the next time I go, though, because I bet the view is amazing from way up there!
Along with the rides, we also ate a late lunch and dinner. The lunch was at this restaurant that claimed to be Spanish and Italian, but, sadly was not! The food wasn't bad, but it also wasn't the greatest! Dinner, however, was really good! Of course, it was a completely American meal at Bubba Gump's!
I know that I can't possibly write about every new experience while I'm here. It would get to where I was writing so much that I wouldn't have anytime to try new things! I just got here, though, and everything is still so shiny and new to me that it's hard to decide which things to leave out!
To that end, I should really mention something else. I'd be remiss if I left out the people I've met. Jeremy has taken me to two dinners with his coworkers and their spouses and children. I'm not really that great with meeting new people. I don't really talk much and it takes a while for me to warm up. I guess there's a part of me that's shy. I'm okay with new people when it's a one-on-one type of situation, but throwing me in with a bunch of new people makes me really nervous and I clam up. It's not just that I can't think of anything intelligent to say, it's that I can't think of anything AT ALL to say! I think I've done pretty well with meeting the people here, though! I hope anyway! Jeremy seems to work with some pretty cool people, and, so far, I seem to get along with all of them and their families! I hope that feeling is mutual; it seems like it is! I have had fun with all of them the last couple weekends!
I have a meet and greet in two days. I'm pretty nervous about that. Tomorrow, though, I'm going with a couple other wives to Yokosuka, where my friend and her husband are stationed. I can't wait! I'll get to do some shopping, eat lunch, and hang out with a good friend from home. I'm really looking forward to that! As for that meet and greet...I just hope I manage to have real conversations with people despite my nerves! I wish Jeremy could go with me, but it's for spouses, and he'll be at work, so I'm on my own!
Have I only been here for eight days? Wow! Jeremy and I have done a lot in that time! I'm looking forward to many more adventures with my wonderful husband!
I am overjoyed to announce that I am FINALLY headed to Japan! That's right! This girl is going to get to see her husband VERY soon! Jeremy emailed me my itinerary Sunday night, so this is actually going to happen! It hasn't really hit me yet. I'm not as nervous as I should be, and that's a little disconcerting. It's possible I may be in denial!
I am so very excited to see Jeremy! In five days we'll have been married for six months. Out of those six months, we have spent less than nine days together. Saying that I'm excited is a huge understatement! I've spent six months waiting for this news. I can't even put into words how excited I am! I've spent so much time focusing on being miserable without Jeremy, and now I get news that I get to see him really soon, and, I honestly don't even know how to react!
I'm suddenly aware of all kinds of stuff that I need to get done in a very short amount of time! I got started today. All of our paperwork (that's in my possession) is organized and in a binder. I had really been putting that off because I had to make copies and this and that, and, honestly, I'm just not the most organized person! Also, I'm a procrastinator! My parents are selling my car for me once I'm gone, but since we're still paying on it, my mom and I had to go by the credit union to make sure her name was on the title. I made my doctor's appointment to get my immunizations all caught up tomorrow. I'm really not looking forward to that. I HATE shots! I have to call the vet in the morning and see when I can come by and get the cats' health certificates.
I'm trying to be very calm about this. I'm trying to just get everything done and keep busy so that I don't completely lose it! I am so excited to see Jeremy, but it is sad to be leaving my family and friends. I also feel bad about how happy I am to be leaving. No, I'm not saying this right. It's not so much that I feel bad. It's more that I don't want to hurt any one's feelings by showing them how overjoyed I really am to be leaving! I know that they know I'm happy. I've been waiting long enough, but I don't want to rub it in.
Ahh! I'm so excited! I'm also so nervous! I've never flown overseas before. The farthest I've ever been from home (Mississippi) is Cancun! I haven't seen my husband in so long...I'm nervous about seeing him again with the extra weight I've put on. We Skype everyday, so it's not like he can't see me, but that's still not the same as in person. We've talked about it, and he doesn't care, but I'm a girl, and so I care! It's okay, though, I am in the second week of Couch to 5k, and in a few weeks I'm going to start the Insanity workout. I just would like to be looking my best after not seeing him for so long. I'm sure everyone understands that! The point is that I'm nervous about all kinds of different stuff!
More than any nervousness or thoughts of missing my family and friends, I am happy. I am so happy that we are actually about to start our lives. I'm about to be living with my husband and our two little fur babies. We get to explore Japan together and see all kinds of really cool stuff. We both love roller coasters and are already planning on riding several I read about online. Jeremy bought a book on Japanese tourism back in February, so we've been wanting to do all kinds of different things for months now. I am so very happy that we will get to start this adventure very soon. There is no one I'd rather be with than my husband. There is nowhere I'd rather be than with him. He is my heart, my other half, and I am so happy, and so thankful, that I am headed to Japan to be with him!
Amber is officially headed to Asia!
It appears that I may actually get to see my husband again sometime [relatively] soon! I'm not going to be overly excited, nor am I going to get my hopes up too high, about the latest news from Jeremy. However, my smile is brighter today, and my heart isn't quite so heavy. I am so very thankful for that!
This whole new chapter in my life has me all out of sorts. I know nothing about the military. They have this whole different way of life. They speak their own language. I don't understand 75% of what my husband says when he talks about work. Actually, that percentage may not even be high enough!
I'm moving to the other side of the world to be with Jeremy. There's nothing that I wouldn't do for him. I'm just worried about how I'm going to adjust to this new life. I'm going to be facing a whole bunch of new all at once. Because I am really nervous about all of this, I have started reading blogs. I have been seeking out blogs about the military, specifically those written by the wives.
I'm going to do a comparison for you: military wives' blogs are to a new military spouse what WebMD is to a hypochondriac. This is no exaggeration! And, just like any good hypochondriac, I can't stop reading them! I have read horror story after horror story! I have read all about how horrible these women are to each other. I have read all about pest-infested housing. I have read all about cheating husbands. (I should note here that I trust my husband completely. He'd never do that!) I have read all about cheating wives. (And, I should note here that I would never do that!) This is not to say that I haven't read some uplifting and inspiring stories as well. I have, of course.
Some of the blogs that I read just amaze me! Sometimes, though, the comments that follow are even more awful than the blog itself. People say anything in the comments! They curse, they name call, they talk about their husband's CO, the wife of the CO...they say things that even someone as new as I am knows better than to say! There are times that I enjoy reading the stuff, though. Sometimes these women really make me laugh! Take, for instance, the page on Facebook that I "like." A couple different wives have recently made some really awful comments on this page. I mean AWFUL! I remember thinking as I read one in particular I wonder who'd kill me first if I posted this: my husband or my momma! These comments didn't stay up very long, and the page itself didn't take them down, so my guess is someone's husband (or momma, but most likely husband) made sure the comments were taken down.
I feel like I'm headed into some kind of high school for adults. I didn't much care for high school the first time around. Teenagers are horrible! I don't want a redo of that! I love the show, Army Wives. One of the wives on a blog actually mentioned it the other day. She was talking about the relationships between spouses whose husbands have different ranks. She said, "We all know that it's not really like the love fest they portray on Army Wives." Of course, I know that this show is a complete work of fiction. I said I was new to the military, not plain stupid. However, I didn't need to see my favorite show ripped apart in black and white! This is what I mean by high school for adults, though. I don't miss all the clicks and mean girls and all the horrible stuff that goes along with high school!
Given some of the stuff that I've read, and stories I've heard first hand, I'm not really excited about making new friends on post. How sad is that? I guess my hope is that when I get there and start meeting people I'll find that it's not as bad as I feared it would be. And, what will I do if I get there and it is that awful? I would hope that even then I'd manage to find at least one friend, but given the fact that I've spent more time apart from my husband than with him, I don't think I would mind spending all my time with him! As for the times when I just can't pull him away from his computer and I'm dying to leave the house, I will have one real girlfriend there. One of my best friends (and her family) from home live close by where we'll be. They're not on post with us, but close enough!
Regardless of everything I've read and heard, I am very excited about this move. I can not wait to see my husband. Our wedding day was the happiest day of my life. I want to spend the rest of my life making him as happy as I was that day! I just have this feeling that it's almost time. This has taken long enough. It can't possibly take much longer. It's almost been six months. I feel like any day now Jeremy is going to call and tell me it's all finished and I need to get on a plane! I know that I said I wasn't going to get overly excited, but the thought of seeing my husband soon does that to me! No story could ever be so awful that it could lessen that excitement!
It's funny how things work out sometimes. Just last night, I had started writing about how easy it is for me to forget that this separation is hard on my husband as well as on myself. I get so caught up in how this is affecting me and forget that it isn't easy on him, either. I was writing about how I sometimes take out my frustrations on him because there isn't anyone else. I was going to tell everyone how I know that isn't fair and how horrible it makes me feel when he finally gets to the point that he can't take it anymore, and in that moment I am able to see just how much this hurts him. It's easy for me to forget because he is so good at not showing me that it's hard for him, too. When he does finally show me, when I'm at that point that I'm either mad as hell or "ugly crying," and he just can't take it anymore, and I am able to see that he feels just as bad as I do, I then immediately feel worse. I know that he lets me vent and fume and curse and whatever else I need to do, while he tries to make me feel better regardless of how he feels. I know that it can't be easy for him to see me so upset.
I was going to say all of this. I was going to say how awful it makes me feel that I make him even sadder about our situation. I was going to say that it's not right for me to get so upset that I make him upset.
I was going to...then I Skyped with Jeremy. And, Jeremy told me the latest news (or lack thereof) of when I would be able to join him. Now, I was under the impression that my paperwork was in the hands of the last person that had to sign off on it before it went back to Jeremy. Not that I really have any idea what that means. But, to put it in perspective, this is what I thought: My medical was taking forever, but was finally approved in May. This means that now my paperwork just had to go up the chain on post. I was under the impression that this normally takes about 30 days, but can take up to 90.
That means that my paperwork is now closer to the 90 day than the 30 day mark, since they've had it for a little over two months. Where I'm going with this is that I thought for sure I'd be getting some very good news soon.
Good news? I must have been thinking crazy! I know better than to get my hopes up, because the higher the hopes, the harder the fall. You have to understand that I know nothing about the military, so to repeat exactly what Jeremy told me last night would be impossible. But, what I gather from last night's conversation is that my paperwork is not in the hands of the person I thought it was. It's not at its final destination, it's more like in the middle of it. I'm not sure where, exactly, that is, but I do know that they had lost part of it. That's right. LOST IT. So, basically, my paperwork has been sitting on someone's desk for God knows how long missing part of it. There is no telling how long it's been collecting dust. I just think that someone, anyone, at some point in time, could have called my husband and said something like, "Hey, I seem to have misplaced your certificate of marriage, and I'm going to need another copy before your wife will ever be allowed over here."
Did that happen? NO! Jeremy had to seek them out, and then was told that they lost part of it. Are you kidding me?!
Of course, I'm sure you know what happened next. Yep. I cursed and cried and got lost in how bad I felt that, even though I was right in the middle of writing about this very thing, lost sight of the fact that this hurts Jeremy, too.
I need to make this clear: I love my husband with all my heart. Being with him makes me happier than anything in the world, despite the fact that he is so far away. There is no length of time apart, or distance, that could ever change that. Nor am I mad him. I don't think any of this is his fault. When I'm mad I'm not cursing him out; I'm not crying just to hurt him. I'm crying because I can't not cry. I'm cursing out the people that so obviously suck at their job. It's almost as if they don't care at all about families and/or marriages. That's who I'm mad at, not my husband. Unfortunately, he's the one who has to hear all about it.
Today, I, once again, feel awful. I shouldn't make him witness my tantrums, (for lack of a better word) no matter how valid I think I am in throwing in them. I can take a lot. I really can. I'm not a weak woman. But, in five days, I will have been married for five months, and in that time, have seen my husband for less than nine days. It's enough to break anyone.
I thought I knew what I was marrying into. I had prepared myself for the moves, for being far away from family and friends, for missing holidays, birthdays, and anniversaries with my husband. What I did not prepare myself for was being separated from him without any real reason. He's not deployed or temporarily off somewhere that I can't be. I'm just not with him because, after almost FIVE MONTHS, my paperwork still hasn't been fully processed. I can't even wrap my mind around it! You would think that instead of just carelessly tossing paperwork aside, and losing vital parts of it in the process, someone would actually take the time to do their job and get wives to their husbands!
I want to say so much about how it makes me feel and what I think of this whole process, but I know I shouldn't. I will say this: There has got to be a better way! There has to be a more efficient way of doing things. If, at any of my previous jobs, I was this incompetent, or we had a system that worked this inefficiently, I would've been fired and a better system implemented. Yet, this is allowed to continue. It's madness.
I really don't understand...I'm beginning to feel as if there will never be any Asia.
Unfortunately, Amber still is not in Asia! I miss my husband more and more every day. This is not how I expected to spend the first four months of marriage! I love that we are able to Skype almost everyday; I'm not sure how I would be handling the separation otherwise. It's so hard, though, to see his face and not be able to touch it, touch him. I can see him, I talk to him, laugh with him, but I'm not with him. I guess military wives go through this all the time, and I should get used to it. I'm not sure how one ever gets used to being separated from their other half, though. Not only that, but, I'm new to this! I feel like I'm being cheated out of what should be the happiest time in my life. It's very frustrating to say the least.
Moving to the other side of the world is frustrating as well, especially considering that the army isn't paying for the move. I've spent a little over $600 in the last two weeks mailing our things from here to Japan, and I'm not done yet. I gave away all of my furniture, with the exception of my chest of drawers and vanity. It was going to be less expensive to buy new furniture than it would be to ship mine, so it made sense. I can keep those two items at my parents' without really putting them out, but there wasn't anywhere to keep all the rest. Since we already decided that we were going to buy furniture in Japan, it didn't make any sense to put mine in storage. If we did that, when we got back to the states, we'd have two of everything!
Besides storing my bedroom furniture at my parents' house, I'm also storing myself and our two cats. My lease was up at the end of June, and I didn't want to sign another one knowing (hoping, anyway) that I'd be leaving soon. I could pay month-to-month, but they'd add an additional $100 per month for that, and that just seemed like a waste of money. Besides, it's good that I'm able to spend the time before I leave here with my parents. They sure are going to miss me! Ha! Of course I'll miss them, too!
Honestly, I was going to really rant about something that's been on my mind here lately, but, on the off chance that someone unexpected reads this, I think I'll wait until I'm safely on the other side of the world! I guess I could say a little and then finish once I'm there...
I have somewhat recently been made aware of just where I stand with, well, with almost everyone in my life. The funny thing about getting married, about putting all that effort into just one day is, once it's over, you know. You know everything. You know your place in your family and who your best friends are. There are the people that were so willing to help that they stayed at the church with you for hours and hours. There are the people that went dress shopping with you before you were even officially shopping. There were the people that went shopping with you time and time again because you kept forgetting stuff or you changed your mind, or you just had a crazy bridal whim. There are the people that should have been part of the actual wedding party and it broke your heart and theirs that they weren't. And, then for that same person to be the one to throw your bachelorette party, well, you really really know where you stand with them. There are people that no matter what kind of awful thing (and I do mean awful) is going on with them that day, they still show up just to do your makeup. There are people that should just be seated guests that instead are fixing your wedding cake that was almost destroyed en route to the wedding. There are people that you just couldn't ever imagine getting married without them being present, and so your soon-to-be husband makes sure they are on a plane, and picked up from the airport, and then completely made over so that they are usher-ready. There are people that would never dream of missing your wedding.
And, then there are other people. It's these people that I'll tell you about once I'm safely on the other side of the world...if I ever get there!
On February 25, I married the love of my life, my very best friend, Jeremy. Nine days later, Jeremy left for Japan, and, even though I knew in my head it wouldn't be long before I joined him there, my heart didn't get the message. I fell apart for a few weeks, and I still have my days when I don't want to get out of the bed or see anyone, but for the most part, I'm back to my old self. I don't have much choice but to keep it together anyway! The only way I get to join my husband on the other side of the world is if I get all this crazy army paperwork filled out and turned in, then corrected and turned back in, then corrected again...then there's magically a new form to fill out...and that doesn't even cover the paperwork for the cats! It's very frustrating, but at least it's all finally done! Now, I just have to wait.
I'm not the most patient person in the world, and I'm sure that I'm starting to drive Jeremy crazy, asking everyday if he knows anything yet. I keep telling him how I'm ready to be there, ready to be settled in our home, ready to have an actual honeymoon! I keep saying how I'm ready to really start our life together. And, I am. There's nothing that I want more than to be his wife, than to live our life, on the same continent, like normal people. I think that we are going to have a wonderful adventure together. Not many couples (American anyway) can say that they started their life together in Japan! I know that we're going to make wonderful memories visiting amazing places together! Before Jeremy left, he bought a tourism book on Japan. We picked all kinds of places out that we wanted to visit together. Since then, I added four roller coasters to that list! I am excited!
Truth be told, though, I am also scared. I've never lived anywhere other than different parts of the south. I can't imagine that Japan is anything like Mississippi! Rationally, I know that I'll be fine, I mean, I'll be with my husband, who loves me, and one of my best girlfriends will be less than an hour from me. That's the thing about fear, though, it's not rational. I'm nervous about being so far away from my family, from my Momma! I'm scared to death about being surrounded by people that speak a language that I don't understand. Honestly, I'm scared of a city the size of Tokyo. I'm sure it'll make the city I love, my second home, New Orleans, look inconsequential in comparison. And, then, there's the plane ride. I'm not sure the exact number of hours my flight will be yet...15 hours, 17 hours? I'm not sure. All I do know for sure is that I don't want to be on a plane that long! I don't know if there's enough valium in the world for a flight that long! Our cats, our poor babies, will be on the plane as well. I'm scared they'll hate me for putting them through that! It's all just so much to take in!
Wow! It feels good to say that! It's amazing how much it helps to just admit your fears! The reality is, scared or not, I'm going to Japan. As scared as I may be, there's nowhere I'd rather be than there. With my husband. So, I'm going to use this as my safe place. If I'm scared, I'll admit I'm scared. If I'm happy, I'll share that joy. If I'm sad, or mad, I'll vent my frustrations. I know how lucky I am to be taking this crazy adventure with Jeremy. There is no one that I'd rather travel the world with. He is my best friend, and we have fun together sitting at home doing nothing...I can't even imagine how much fun it'll be exploring a whole new culture together! I can't wait to share stories and photos with my friends and family!
